Busted Marriages, Bitter Men
Having recently done my first radio interview and scheduled several more, a girlfriend of mine suggested I check out Tom Leykis. She did say he’s outrageous.
I couldn’t sleep last night. So in the wee hours I went to Tom’s website and read a rant he wrote about Tiger Woods. Or rather, about how marriage is for losers. He writes that most men would leave their wives if they struck it rich and that men live with “the best woman they can afford”.
It always astounds me when some seemingly intelligent men can’t discern the difference between a gender issue and a socio-economic one. But then again, men are missing 30% of their connective brain tissue*. In some men this seems to be associated with an overall lack of empathy, and men certainly aren’t culturally encouraged to have empathy for women. Obviously, many of them don’t even try. (Just to be fair, if women were in charge, I’m sure there would be women like that too.) So in a way it’s not their fault. A combination of nature and nurture has condemned them to gender ignorance. This is where I come in: I’d like to help.
First of all, check out this link on Celebrity Single Moms. Anyone who hasn’t noticed that the wealthier and more attractive a woman is, the less inclined she is to marry (as Tiger probably should have been at 29, I agree with Tom Leykis there) simply hasn’t been paying attention.
Someone might also suggest that Tom veer from his anecdotal data and try googling some actual studies (heavily footnoted in my DFFP Chapter 13) on marital happiness; if he did, he would find that on every continent married men are the happiest of people. They are much happier than the average single guy. Conversely, married women are always unhappier than their single sisters. This tells us marriage serves men better than women. And finally…well, there was this comment following a long string of the same following Tom’s Tiger rant:
“Marriage in America is like Communism. It works well in theory but falls apart when practiced. Marriage is about money and just another way for women to transfer our wealth to them. If you really don’t think marriage is based on money, try getting a divorce without a prenup. If marriage is really as you would like it to be then women wouldn’t expect an exhobitant pay off to leave our lives but they do. Until this changes and until divorce laws change I agree with Mr. Levkis and I’m going to boycott marriage until it becomes an amicable thing for men (but we both know that will never happen).”
Unbelievable. See my point about lack of brain matter above. I submitted: “Why don’t you date a career woman for a change? 33% of women in American now earn more than their husbands you Neanderthal. When divorce happens in that circumstance, women pay alimony too. It’s not women’s fault that they were constrained from education and jobs. Remember the brilliant plan the US government had to make Rosie the Riveter give her job up so a man could have it after WWII? Women’s depression rates skyrocketed over the next twenty years (and counting). And women pilots who kicked ass in the war were also forced to quit post-war so more men could fly. You think they wanted that? You think any one wants to be demoted from such a fantastic job to cleaning toilets and scrubbing grout? If so, you’re insane. Let us work, pay us fairly and watch the old system change. EVERYONE prefers financial freedom and independence. It’s not gender specific, numb nut.” In retrospect, I could have avoided the name calling. But a girl can only take so much.
best,
cj
* note: while it’s true that women have 30% more connective tissue between brain hemispheres (not to mention more “gray matter” over all) than men, I don’t actually believe this makes men inferior. But since there are so many men who still seem to believe that women’s differences equal inferiority, I thought, just for fun, someone ought to state this brain difference the same way. Plus, why doesn’t anyone ever mention what that girls start talking before boys developmentally? If that were reversed, misogynists & chauvanists would have used it as evidence for male superiority years milleniums ago.